MY EYES! MY EYES!

Who in their right mind would show up to work on Halloween dressed as a Dominatrix?

Friday

It is Friday morning at 9:30 and I can't wait to get out of this office. The boss will roll in around 2 and want to have meetings to massage his ego and I am just not up to it today. I want to skip out and have fun. The weather is great. The Monarchs are migrating thru my backyard on their trek to Mexico and I want to be anywhere but here. I put in some really long hours this week.

Where is my knight in shining armor to save me from this?

THAT was weird!

I was driving home my usual route this week and was stopped at at stoplight. I look up and on a telephone pole there is a huge nest. I am kinda looking at it and waiting for the light to change and I see about 10 birds all around it. I am looking at them and all of a sudden I notice that they are green. They are about the size of a pigeon but shaped differently. They are a nest of parrots or conures or something. I tried to take a picture but the light changed. It was the weirdest thing. I had no idea parrots could survive this far north. It was really cool to see a flock of parrots or whatever in the Dallas area. Someone must have had a pet escape or something surely. I wish I had gotten a picture. I passed there again last night and found the nest but there was no sign of the birds.

Edit: I saw them again on Friday on the way home so I am not nuts.

The Weather

It has cooled off here finally and I am so glad. My electric bill last month was nearly $400 and I can't afford another one like that anytime soon. Most of my flowers are gone now and I need to get out and clean the gutters and do yardwork it has been too hot to do.

Foul Mood

I am generally in a pretty poor mood these days. I have had a sinus headache now for the better part of 2 weeks. It gets better a bit then gets worse. I think the mood is a direct result of the headache.

Strattera

It was a swing and a miss. He barfed at school today and didn't eat at school yesterday. The doctor took him off it. The Concerta is down to 18mg but my son said his heart was skipping beats today at school.

The urologist has me irriated. I am also convinced that the Concerta is causing the UTI's but the urologist says no. He also wouldn't call in the script for antibiotics prior to the VCUG tomorrow. He left it to the cardiologist to take care of. The whole thing has me so pissed off and broke.

Go Figure

On the whole, I think I am a pretty good person. I am pretty smart and generally try to be kind and thoughtful towards others. I am professionally successful and am at least moderately attractive. Most days though, I feel like a total failure. I have tried to figure this out over the years. I know I have a lot going for me and to many people I seem very strong and resilient. Honestly, I think I am strong and resilient. However, that doesn't mean I don't feel like a failure.

For the most part, I am happy with my life. There isn't too much I would change. I am single again and pretty happy that way. I don't see ever getting married again. I just don't want to have to work that hard at a relationship. I don't want to have to compromise and I don't want to have to put up with all the stuff I had to put up with when I was married.

I love my sons. I don't have much contact with the older ones but I think honestly that is fairly normal.

I genuinely love my job. I love the work I do and I know I am excellent at it. I need to make more money but I think that will happen before too terribly long.

I think maybe I am just tired. I am tired of struggling and tired of never quite feeling like I am where I need to be. I am tired of being so broke and so exhausted that I can't do the things with my child that I feel like I should. I am tired of being so lonely even if I don't want to be married. I am tired of never having a really clean house because I genuinely don't have time to get everything done. I would love to have really clean baseboards and windows.

I hate when that happens

I have a cut on the corner of my mouth that I keep ripping open. It started out as a pimple or something and just kept tearing. I thought maybe it was a cold sore but I took cold sore medicine and it didn't make a difference. It starts to heal and I brush my teeth and rip it open. I take a bit of something and rip it open. I forget and yawn and rip it open. It isn't big. It is just like a paper cut in the corner of my mouth. It is driving me nuts.

Movie Review

Batman Begins - Probably the best of all the Batman movies so far.

Napolean Dynamite - I just don't get it. I haven't made it all they way thru but what I have seen so far is just a movie about a bunch of dorks.

Pretty Woman - I saw it for the first time last night. I found it horribly depressing. There are no knights on white horses even if we all dream there are.

I am anxious to see Chicken Little, Goblet of Fire, Jarhead, Your's Mine and Our's, and The Chronicles of Narnia.

Happy Birthday?

Why don't I have parties like this

Uh Oh!

I take Wellbutrin. I am supposed to take 150mg twice a day. Once in the morning and once in the late afternoon. I kept forgetting to take the one in the afternoon and it would keep me up at night so I start taking both doses together in the morning. It seemed to work well.

About a month ago, I took my son to the Dr for his annual follow up on his ADD meds. While we were there, the Dr. found an irregular heartbeat and a clicking noise in his heart. He did an EKG, took one look at it and referred us to a pediatric cardiologist. Of course, this panicked me. I went thru 2 weeks of misery worrying about my son. I would listen to his chest while he was sleeping to see if I could hear the irregularity and I could and that just make me more worried and paranoic. I started researching what could be causing this because 2 years ago when he had surgery on his arm he was fine. The only thing that had really changed was the additon of the ADD medicine. So, I read the Patient info and it said it could cause the irregular heartbeat. I called the Dr. and we agreed to stop the ADD meds until we saw the cardiologist. We get to the cardiologist and of course the EKG is normal. (Thank God!) The cardiologist does find a congential heart defect but it isn't serious at least right now. But, having gone thru that with my son, I started being more sensitive to my own heartbeat. I noticed that my own heart had been skipping beats and I felt a mild tightness in my chest.

Well, what does this have to do with me taking the Wellbutrin? It seems that you are supposed to take only 150mg at a time or it can cause seisures or irregular heartbeat.

I am sitting here right now kinda feeling like I am on speed or something (or at least what I think speed feels like because I don't really know) Needless to say. I am not taking both at the same time anymore. Boy am I DUMB.

Napoleon Dynamite

I rented it with my free monthly Blockbuster Coupon I get with my online thingy. I want to see if it is worth the hype. I suspect not. I will review tomorrow after I have seen it.

Favorite Daylily

I can't remember the name of this one but I think it is my favorite. But if you ask me tomorrow I will have a different favorite.

Plants

I am dividing my irises and daylilies this weekend. If you would like some, send me an email and I will send you some. I have a huge variety but I can't promise certain colors or specific plants at this point. I have some really nice ones. I can guarantee the lavendar iris that smell like grape jelly if you would like some of those. I have those planted separately.

Both of these daylilies are pictures I took in my yard.

ADD update

We are switching from Concerta to Strattera. We saw the doctor on Thursday and he felt the Strattera might be a better alternative in view of the episode with the irregular heartbeat. The Strattera works a little differently and you have to have a theraputic blood level where as the Concerta's effects are immediate. We cut the dose to 18mg of Concerta til the blood level is high enough for the Strattera to be effective. It may not work on my son though. We are still doing the Holter Monitor starting on Nov 1 to see how the Concerta affects him. I am positive it is what was causing the irregular heartbeat and possibly several other problems.

I love the cardiologist. He listens and hears me out and considers what I have to say even if he doesn't agree. The urologist on the other hand just blows me off. It may be time for a new urologist.

Joke of the day

What do you get when you send Joey Buttafuco to Harvard?





Teddy Kennedy!

Amy Fisher

Not sure what made me think of her this evening. I followed her trial at the time with a morbid fascination. I think despite of everything she did and went thru, she turned out to be a pretty decent human being. I think Joey Buttafuco should have done a lot more hard time than he did.
She certainly wasn't innocent but I do think she was a kid that was horribly used and misled. I am not excusing her but I think Buttafuco is scum.

It is hard to be a woman that makes a large salary

I have made more money than most of the men I have had a relationship with. There were a few that made more than me but they did not have as much education and were basically highly skilled laborers. I think that most men are intimidated by a woman that can support herself. Some are attracted to the money. I have several successful women friends and we all have the same problems with men. I think deep down inside most successful men want their women to need them financially and be dependent. The only place I didn't feel that way so much was when I was on active duty in the Army and I think even there, the men want wives that they are not threatened by. I don't mean physically threatened I mean they want women that make them feel like they are big and strong and the smartest. I think it is the rare man that wants a wife that is an equal. It is a shame there are a lot of great women out there and honestly the men are settling for something less.

Not Politically Correct But.....

I still think it is funny

Bridges of Madison County

I dated a man for many years off and on. I have to honestly say I loved him (and still do) best of all. He once came to see me and told me he had read The Bridges of Madison County and just had to see me. I hadn't seen him in over 4 years at the time. I miss him and will always hold a special place in my heart for him. I don't think it would have worked. We just came from very different backgrounds. I sure did love him though. Maybe more because it never quite worked.

Crossing Jordan

I love that show. I like it better in the more recent ones where she dated Woody. They should get married. I don't see it in the cards right now since he went nuts. Happens to the best of us.

ADD medicine

I put my son back on ADD meds. He was having too many problems in school. I don't like it but don't see an alternative. We are going to do the heart monitor for 24 hours in 2 weeks. Update then.

It has been a while

It has been a really long week and it is just Wednesday. I haven't worked out in a week and a half and my jeans are snug. I have a major headache.

Someone entertain me.

Wife of criminal lawyer Horowitz found dead

This story is too bizarre

Army VS TCU

I might have tickets to the game. I hope the guy decides to give them to me.

That ROCKS! I am dying to see a game with the Corps of Cadets in attendence.

Gratuitous Cute Animal Pic of the Day

HELP!

My son is ADD. I can live with that but the ADD meds mess with is heart. I can't live with that. The teachers are going nuts. Anyone with $.02 please chip in.

Just sayin'!

I have several Muslim friends that I honor and respect. Does that mean I can trust them as far as I can throw them? NO, because honestly that is how they feel about Christians

A bet

I am betting 80/20 odds that an idiot at work won't last another month. Ask me about it on 11/14/05

Married, Divorced, or TDY

This was a saying we had in the Army. Most of you won't get it but it still makes me laugh. It probably shouldn't but it does.

The other rule of thumb was if you crossed the Mississippi, you were no longer legally married in what ever state you happened to be in.

Again, not really funny but tonight something made me think of it.

Chewbacca!

Chewie is becoming an American!

Sinus headache

I have a ferocious sinus headache. I went to get the Equate Brand of Sudaphed tonigh at Walmart only to find out they quit making it. I had to pay twice as much for the name brand. Damn meth labs!

A death in the family

A completely different fantail goldfish that the one that kept floating upside down died today. I didn't even know it was sick. It was the largest and prettiest. It was about 8" long including the tail. I had it since it was about 2 inches. One of the tetra's has ich I think too. The goldfish didn't. Not sure what is up. I guess I need to do a full tank cleaning and disinfecting. Melafix is great for getting them healthy again. These fish are old though so they might just be ready to give up the ghost.

Work is stressful

Right now my job is very very stressful. I am hoping it gets better soon. Too tired to write anything else.

Paid Programming

I have insomnia. I hate paid programming. I realize that the networks make money from it but it irritates the hell out of me. Who wants to watch an hour long commerical? Give me reruns.

Thoughts after working out

I did another 30 minutes while watching Law and Order SVU. I am gritty with salt and sweaty and wishing I could go dive in the pool but it is too cool now. I am going to finish watching SVU then get in the shower. It is late and now I am too keyed up to sleep. Maybe I will clean for a while.

Exercise and Sweat

I have been slacking off and was feeling guilty. I ate ice cream, oreo's and movie popcorn so I knew I had to work out tonight. I did 50 minutes last night and just did 35. I am absolutely dripping sweat and I feel terrifc. Gritty with salt and sticky with sweat but I know I will feel extra clean after I am out of the shower. I need to get back on for at least another 30 minutes to burn off the extra calories and raise my basal metabolic rate. I have a sinus headache though. I hope there is something good on TV to keep me distracted.

Rant about movie goers

I took my son to the $ movies to see War of the Worlds again. It is cheap entertainment on a slow Sunday afternoon. We get there early enough to get popcorn and drinks and a good seat. We get in and get sat down and wait for the movie to start. My ADD son is behaving extremely well and while he is impatient for the movie to start he isn't climbing on the seat or anything just quietly chatting with me. The movie finally starts and the lights go down. We get thru the previews and the feature is about 5 minutes into it. There is no one sitting around us and I like it that way so if my son does get fidgety then we don't bother anyone. Suddenly, this older couple comes in. Both are grossly overweight and they climb over the people on the end to come sit next me. The woman puts her behind right in my face while getting seated and is already crowding me with her legs an etc but I figure it isn't a big deal. I go back to watchin the movie and they start a running conversation. I don't mean a few whispers here or there but a normal volume discussion during the entire movie. I finally get fed up and shhhhhhh then without even realizing I am doing it. They they both have to take bathroom breaks and climb back over everyone to do it. Of course they do it separately. And have to loudly discuss what the other missed while they were gone. It just burned me up. My seven year old behaved better than they did.

Fall Break is over

My son goes back to school tomorrow and I go back to work in the office. I have mixed feelings about it. It is easier to have a routine when he goes to school and I can probably get more done in the office.

He is not going back on the ADD medicine just yet.

It is starting to be fall here. We went from highs of 100 during the day to highs of 70 during the day pretty much overnight. I know it will get hot again but the cool weather is coming more often. We really need rain.

Ohio food

I grew up in a cornfield outside of Cincinnati. We didn't eat out much but when we did, one of the places was Arthur Treachers Fish and Chips. Now, I have no idea who Arthur Treacher is but there used to be a location in Milford and we would occassionally eat their Fish and Chips. I hate fish but I loved this place. There is no such thing in Texas. I miss it.

A possible death in the family

My male fantail goldfish keeps floating upside down. He will do it for a few minutes then go swim a while and then float to the top upside down again. Generally, this is not a good sign. I am feeding them peas to try to unconstipate them. That is usually what causes that but I think I am probably too late. I have had that fish longer than I had my last husband. I sure won't cry when it dies but I will feel sadness at it's passing.

Edit: He made it through the night so I am more optimistic. He still floats upside down at the top some times but less often.

Edit: The peas seem to have worked. He quit floating upside and swims normally now.

I have mixed feelings about this one

I entered the Army as a 2LT in 1983. My first Company Comander was a guy that had been a Special Forces Medic and had gone thru Bootstrap (a program back then that essentially paid enlisted folks to go to college and get a degree so they were eligible for Officer Candidate School)

He was an outstanding Commander and taught me just about everything I ever knew about the Army. He was strong and smart and charismatic and still is. If I ever had to go to war, I would want it to be with him.

I got out of the Army as soon as they started letting people after the first Gulf War was over. My husband at the time had gone and I was on a filler list to go and my ex and my sister were both scheduled to deploy shortly before it ended. At the time, I had 2 young sons and not a really good person to leave them with and I decided right then and there that I wouldn't put them in the position of maybe being parentless again. I got out in May of 1991. I had stayed in touch with my first Company Commander and I got him his first civilian job when he got out in 1994 (he retired after 30 years.) In those 30 years on active duty, he didn't spend much time at home. He was deployed more often than being home.

I talk to him about once a week now and back in August, he told me he had been asked to go to Iraq for some type of operation. (He had worked a lot of covert ops so I didn't pry much.) I am curious though because he has been retired for 10 years and I think he must be going in a civilian capacity. He said his wife and grown children were thoroughly upset with him going. They believe we need to be there but they feel he has done his share. At first, I thought they would get over it. I didn't think it was a big deal. In the last week though, I have decided it is terribly selfish of him to go. His wife and kids did the Army time just like he did and now he is retired and damn if he isn't going back and putting them thru the worry again. When I talked to him last week, he said something about what he does when he goes to war. I couldn't but help think he was trying to relive his glory days. He was truly and outstanding soldier and probably still would make an outstanding soldier but he isn't anymore. I wish I could tell him that but I think it would be a mistake. It wouldn't change a thing and would only piss him off. I sure feel sorry for his family though.

My son in Iraq

I don't get much mail from him. I decided I need to do things to get his attention so he will email me at least once a week. I have been thinking about what I would do for a while now but didn't hit on a winning idea until today. We were at Sonic eating lunch and the Local Junior High School Cheerleaders were being the car hops for tips. Noah (he is all boy,) immediately said "Hey Mom, those girls like me." They were kinda fussing over him and his redhair so I got the idea that I need to get them to pose for a picture with my youngest to send to my middle son. The picture is at right.

Hottest Guys from War Movies

Since I was in the Army and come from an Army family I tend to watch a lot of war/military movies. Below is my list of hottest guys just from War or War related movies.

1. Eric Bana He was okay in The Hulk and excellent in Troy. His character in Blackhawk Down is what me fall in love with him though. Or, at least I fell in love with the character. If you haven't seen the movie you should as soon as possible. It is the most realistic war movie I have ever seen. The only thing that bugged me was the hoo awwe. The Rangers bellow it as an answer to everything but no one ever just says hoo awwe.

2. Brad Pitt Nothing better than Brad in leather with lots of leg showing. The love scene was really good too.

3. William Fitchner I probably should put him above Brad Pitt but the leather and leg got to me for Brad.

4. Owen Wilson He makes the list for Behind Enemy Lines. It was different type of part for him but he did very well. I am always a sucker for a guy in a flight suit.

5. Kevin Bacon He made the list for his part in A Few Good Men.

6. Charlie Sheen He made it for Hot Shots. Movie was a spoof but he looked very good. He is a total jerk but still very easy on the eyes.

7. Michael Biehn He made it for 2 movies. One for his role of John Conner in Terminator. Two for his role of Cpl. Hicks in Aliens. Neither are really a war movies but kind of so I decided to qualify them.

8. Oded Fehr He makes the list for his roles in The Mummy and The Mummy Returns.

9. Arnold Vosloo He also makes it for the Mummy movies. He is a baddie but a goodie.

10. Mel Gibson He makes it for The Patriot where he was a total hottie. He would make it for several others but that is my favorite.

8.

The Longest Yard

I just saw the version with Adam Sandler. I liked it a lot better than the first one. I had forgotten how hot William Fitchner is.

I loved Tracy Morgan as the leader of the gays and had to laugh when Rob Schneider popped up out of the stands with his "You can do eettt"

Nicholas Turturro was very good too. It took me a while to realize he was Officer James Martinez on NYPD Blue

London to get sexual 'theme park'

This just strikes me as totally gross. Who would go there?

Katrina evacuee hits jackpot: $1.6 million

Somehow, I don't think it was God that was responsible for this

Best Investments Right Now

I think buying land in or around New Orleans would be extremely profitable right now. A lot of people simply aren't going back and I am of the opinion they are the poorest of the poor that can't afford to and have nothing to go back to. Their land will sell cheap and someone will come along and probably with government grants build hotels or something. It is a shame because I think the poor are getting screwed again but that is exactly what I think is happening.

It really bothers me that New Orleans Mayor C. Ray Nagin, bought a home in Dallas. I am not sure I can explain why but it really makes me dislike him.

More recent picture of my youngest

He is the love of my life. He changed my life in so many ways. He is my second chance at raising children. I screwed up a lot with the first two. I was by no means a perfect mother and still am not but I think I try a lot harder now and am a lot less permissive. Some is because I am older and some is because I am wiser. I know my older boys are jealous of him. It amazes me that they are. When he was about 6 months old, his older brother who was 14 at the time used to take great delight in handing him a toy then pulling it away to get him screaming mad. The cat in the picture is Wonton. She is 10 this year. It is hard for me to grasp that I have had her longer than him.

9-year-old pleads guilty to manslaughter

This makes me ill. I think the little girl needs to be placed in a loving yet very strictly controlled foster home and her parents need to go to prison. Somewhere along the lines they let her think this was acceptable behavior.

Kids and Marriage Quotes of the Day

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

( 1 ) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. -- Alan, age 10

( 2 ) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. -- Kirsten, age 10

Top Ten Hottest Weird Guys

Have you ever found a weird guy attractive? I have and it sometimes bothers me (but not much). At any rate, here is my list of 10 of the sexiest weird guys

1. Steve Buscemi - weird but totally hot, he can put his shoes under my bed anytime

2. Rob Schneider

3. Billy Bob Thornton

4. James Woods

5. Vincent D'Onfrio

6. Richard Belzer

7. Mel Gibson - most don't think he is weird. I do, I think he is totally whacked but still a total hottie.

8. Anthony Edwards - definitely not a male model but still attractive in his own way.

9. John Turturro

10. Chris Kattan - total weirdo but has a certain allure.

Gratuitous Cute Animal Pic of the Day

Not mine but awfully cute.

The Death Penalty

I was reading someone else's blog and they posted about Texas carrying out an execution last night. I used to think it was barbaric and that everyone had some good in them. Unfortunately for me, I no longer believe that. I think there are psychotic people that have no sense of remorse and are not capable of it. I think the lack of remorse is something that cannot be changed, treated or reformed. Consequently, I think we need to get those people out of society if they break the law. I don't think we should feed and house them until they die a natural death because I think the money could be better spent on schools and social programs.

When I was in the Army, there was a JAG officer that they called "The Round Mound of Sound" he was horribly overweight but even though he was the Army kept him. He was an outstanding attorney and if I ever needed one, he would be who I would want (okay now I would maybe want Barry Green.) At any rate, he was giving a lecture in Military Law and the Uniformed Code of Military Justice and he was talking about some cases he had had. He said, sex offenders are not ever sorry for what they did, they are only sorry they got caught.

Wallace and Grommit and the Curse of the WereRabbit

I am dying to see this movie. I am gonna cut out of work early today and take my son up to McKinney to the cheap movies and see it. It is only $2.50 each before 6 PM. I would leave and go now but can't ditch work yet. I did work until 7:30 last night and the night before and started at 7 AM this morning so I don't feel too guilty about cutting out early.

Six US marines killed in Iraq attacks

I worry every time I see a headline like that. I don't worry too much about my son. I know he is bright and has common sense. I also know he is in a job where he isn't in a position to get shot at much. I would worry more if he was. I still would want him to be there though. Don't construe that as me not loving him or as me being a war monger. I am not by any means. I do believe that we are effecting a change in the Middle East that will have long reaching effects for the entire world. I believe we are making it a better place even if it doesn't seem like that to everyone. I would be there too if I could. I can't but I really wish I could.

George Clooney

I grew up in Greater Cincinnati. Nick Clooney was a news anchor. He seemed like a great guy. George Clooney has a certain attractiveness but he irritates the hell out of me these days. Why do celebraties try to push their views on us? He and Tom Cruise are off the top 10 Sexiest Men List.

Current Top Ten

1. Owen Wilson
2. Vince Vaughn
3. Luke Wilson
4. Ewan MacGregor
5. Matthew McConnahey (okay he is a stoner but he still has a hot bod.)
6. Joaquin Phoenix (totally weird but still a hottie)
7. Dennis Quaid (an oldie but a goodie)
8. BD Wong (Gay but who cares?)
9. Christopher Meloni (very dominant and secure in his masculinity)
10. Jamie Sherian (Law and Order: Criminal Intent, he was great in "The Stand")

Al Qaeda recruits techies for Web site

This has me concerned

Cooler weather at last

I opened the windows in the house and will love sleeping with a breeze blowing in. I am sure my allergies will flare up but it is worth it. My electric bill last month was $380. No one is home during the day and I raise the thermostat while we are gone. It is over my budget and I dread it getting really cold. I have a Minpin and a Pug and I can't let the house get very cold because they have almost no fur.

On postivie note

I got a letter in the mail from the Attorney Generals office. My son's father got a job after not having one for almost a year. His wages will be garnished so I should get some money from him. My son is 7 and in 7 years I have gotten a total of about $600 dollars. Yes, you read that right $600 over seven years. I spent more than that a month on daycare. Life isn't fair but I am still very lucky. I have 3 wonderful sons and a house and a job and pets that love me. That is Merlin, my Golden mix in the pic. We were moving when that was taken. I think we were still in Phoenix.

Things I worry about

I took my son to a cardiologist today because our family doctor heard an irregular heartbeat. I felt it was the ADD medicine he was on and we took him off last week. Today he had a regular heartbeat. However, the doctor doesn't think the ADD medicine caused it, he thinks it just happens sometimes. However, while we were at the cardiologist, he found that my son was born with a congenital heart defect. He has a bicuspid aortic valve. His doesn't seem to causing any problems and he said my sons heart was functioning better than most people without the problem. He gave me a card to carry with me all the time that shows that my son has to have antibiotics before any dental treatment or anything else that could introduce an infection to the body.

At any rate, I am not sure he is going to go back on the ADD medicine. If he does, he has to wear a monitor for 24 hours to see how the drug is affecting him.

Katrina T-shirt

I snagged this off the internet. I thought it was hysterical.

My dirty little secret

Okay, I confess. I LOVE McDonalds. I mean I really do. I would go there even if I didn't have a seven year old.

Whine #2

I am broke. I got remarried in 2003 to a man that was interested in me supporting him rather than being a husband and step father. I realized this when his business failed and 9 months later still refused to look for work. I finally indicated to him that he needed to find other accomodations. I attempted to help him get on his feet for about 4 months until I realized that once again I was more worried about what was happening to him than he was. 2 months later, he was totally out of money and borrowed $3k from his 81 year old mother that lives on a fixed income. When that ran out he went to live with her. I filed and processed the divorce myself.

When I married him, I was working full time and living in Phoenix where my job took me. After I married him, I moved back to Texas because he didn't want to move to Phoenix. We moved back into my house because his ex-wife was getting tired of him living and paying rent to her in their old house. To move back to Texas, I gave up my full time job and worked as a contractor with no health insurance and other benefits. The agreement was that the company I was working for would ultimately replace me in Phoenix at some point but if I chose to leave prior to 1 year from the date of the move, I would have to pay back the relocation. Hence I didn't rush to find a job. Eleven months after returning to Texas, they hired someone in Phoenix and I was laid off. Meantime I am still married to the guy that is spending money faster than I can make it and he refuses to get a job. Oh yeah, during this time my son broke his arm falling off the monkey bars at school. It required surgery to the tune of $20K. Even though he fell on school property and broke his arm due to improperly maintained playground equipment, the school refused to pay for any of the bills and you can't sue a school in Texas. I am furiously looking for work and paying ALL the bills and finally find a job at $15k less than I had previously been making. I tossed the husband out after he let his grandson threaten my son with a knife over a Nintendo game while I was at work. Suddenly, I also had to worry about daycare and after school care. Daycare is $170/week. Afterschool care is $80/week.

Whine #1

I am broke. I am supporting my 7 year old pretty much by myself with my parents sending me money when I have a non routine bill. Now, you can say "Hey, that is your fault for spending more than you make." I would have to agree but there are extenuating circumstances. My son has a father and I was married to his father prior to his conception. Bad news is, he was still married to someone else, unbeknownst to me prior to my finding out I was pregnant. This meant that my marriage was not recognized by law and any assets he had were divided with his other wife when she managed to finalize their divorce. I still had to shell out money to have my marriage to him voided. He was $38K+ behind on child support as of 7/2004. It is accruing interest at 6% and he has incurred an additional amount of arrearage since that time. I fully expect that I will never see another dime of money from him. I am honestly okay with that but want him to voluntarily terminate his parental rights to my son. He refuses.

Sniveling in general

I try to not spend too much time sniveling or whining or dwelling on the hand life dealt me. I think you create your own situations most of the time and whining, moaning, and generally feeling sorry for your self is not only counter productive but not good for you emotionally. That and other people get tired of hearing it. I know I do when I have to listen to other people. Having said that, I am going to whine and snivel here for a while. I know long entries are miserable to read sometimes so I will most likely break up my snivels in several small snivels rather than one long really miserable snivel.

Fall Blooming Crocus

My crocus are up! My crocus are up! I am soooo excited!

Endangered jaguar cub makes public debut in Fort Worth

Another gratituous cute animal picture. I swiped this from the Fort Worth Star Telegram.

You and read the article

here.

Knees

Celebrex does wonders for sore knees. I can walk without pain now but I can still feel them grind. Ugh.

I am getting OLD.

Gratuitous Cute Animal Pic of the Day

These aren't mine, my Dad sent me this in an email. It is awful cute.

Harriet Miers Blog

You can see it Harriet Miers Blog It is one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe. Thank goodness I am working from home today or I would have been in trouble!

Make sure you read all the comments and click all the links. The Delay blog is pretty funny too.

Chain-smoking Chinese chimp kicks habit after 16 years

Here is the article.

I think someone should be beaten for giving her cigarettes in the first place.

Working from home

I get to work from home today. My son is on fall break and since I have been working from home a lot in the evenings my boss agreed to let me work from home this week so I didn't have to put my son in daycare. I like working from home because there are less interuptions. There is a down side though. In the strip mall across from my office, there is a coffee shop that roasts the beans in the shop every morning. I have gotten in the habit of getting a nice 20 oz cup of freshly brewed freshly roasted coffee in the mornings. I am in coffee withdrawl right now.

My knees and feet

I have an elliptical trainer that I work out on inside when I wimp out of running outside. Last night I did 70 minutes and my knees are killing me. It doesn't seem to be the impact, I think it is the muscles. The machine has adjustable resistance and I have been cranking it up in hopes of getting stronger and burning more calories. My knees are telling me about it.

I also wish they would make a workout shoe specifically for elliptical trainers. When you run, your foot strike is heel to toe with your heel taking most of the impact. Hence, they put lots of cushioning in the heels. On an elliptical, there is no foot strike (which makes it easier on your knees) but most of the pressure centers on the ball of your foot. The balls of my feet feel bruised.

Spongebob Square Pants Cheez Its

For some reason they don't taste as good to me as the plain old Cheez Its. It may be like the green catsup phenomenon where my brain just can't like it or it may be that since they are targeting kids they feel that the kids won't notice if they don't taste as cheesy. I tend to think it is the first not the second

"Professor Says Pink Locker Room Promotes Sexism, Homophobia"

I am just a posting fool this morning. I have managed to hit a gold mine of really funny things to talk about.

I don't think it is sexist or homophobic. I think it is funny as hell. People need to lighten up. Here is the article

2001 Webby Award Winner

If this is what wins a Webby, I don't want one. It is a whole website where a guy dresses up and acts like Peter Pan. He is 51 years old for gosh sake!

Camel Toe

I am not sure how I stumbled across this site but it is totally hilarious.

Arlington turning to eminent domain for stadium land

I saw this in the Dallas Morning News this morning. The thought of it pisses me off and I don't even live in Arlington. I just can't believe the city can do this and get away with it. Read the story

here

BD Wong

He plays the FBI profiler/psychiatrist on Law and Order: Special Victims Unit. For some reason, I think he is hot as hell. I am not usually attracted to Asian men. He is gay, openly gay, and has played Madame Butterfly. He has also adopted a child with his significant other. I know I am weird as hell but he is just plain HOT.

Edited to note: I think what attracts me might be the character he plays. The profiler/psychiatrist always seems to take the high ground and also be very perceptive of people and characters.

The Land of Nod

Robert Louis Stevenson. I read the poem as a child. My favorite poem of his is "The Land of Counterpane" I also like "The Swing." But, I am off to the Land of Nod. Back to this in the morning.

Cameron Diaz

Ever since I saw her in Vanilla Sky, she creeps me out.

On Squirrels

I have been reading Althouse's blog and she has been talking about squirrels. It reminds me of when I was in college. I went to Morehead State University (Home of that Great Band from Daniel Boone Land.) It is located in Morehead, Kentucky. It is a very small town in Eastern Kentucky. It is absolutely beautiful around the first week in October. At any rate, I digress. I met my first husband (and older boys father) at that college. He was from West Van Lear, Kentucky. Now, I am not surprised if most of you have not heard of West Van Lear. The population is about 4K. I think it is a riot that there is West Van Lear when there is a Van Lear and both towns are not much more than a stop light in a coal mining town.

So, on weekend we would occasionally visit either my parents house or his parents house in West Van Lear. They had indoor plumbing but the toilet was held up by a car jack so it didn't fall thru the floor. The town was horribly poor but I was young and in love. We are there one weekend for the Apple Festival or some such thing, and his mother decided to make Squirrel and Gravy. Now, I am from farm country where you mostly eat beef. I never even had rice until I was 20, it was always potatoes. So, the future mother-in-law gets the squirrel out of the freezer and shows it to me. She says "Look, isn't it cute, it still has a nut in it's mouth." Being the polite kid I was raised to be I ate the squirrel when she cooked it but it was difficult.

As I grew older and was in the Army I ate all kinds of different meat. I have had rattlesnake, bear, bat, rabbit, squirrel and mountain oysters. The mountain oysters aren't half bad regardless of what you hear. They taste like very lean very good pork chops.

On Lesbians

I am of the opinion that most if not all lesbians were molested as children. I think one of two things happens to little girls that are molested. They either become promiscuous or become lesbians. I am not a psychologist but I have know quite a few lesbians and every single one I have known was molested violently as a child. I think that is what makes the difference. The promiscuous girls were most likely groomed and associated love with the sexual attention they were getting. The lesbians associated violence and pain with their experiences. This is just my opinion but I bet studies would prove it out. Ellen Degeneres has talked about how she was molest and so did Anne Heche. Rosie O'Donnell hasn't talked about it but I am guessing she was.

Keanu Reeves

He was a doctor in the movie The Upside of Anger. I just couldn't see him a hot young doctor. He is cute but not a hottie I don't think. I guess he will always be the stoner dude to me.

Edit: I stand corrected. The movie was Something's Gotta Give

SNL Season Premier

The Jet Blue satire is hysterical.

Steve Carell's monolog and song were pretty good too. I didn't see The 40 Year Old Virgin yet but he seems hysterical.

Person found dead after explosion at OU

Doesn't sound good. Not many details out yet.

On Possums

This is a long story but pretty funny as I think back on it.

Background
I live in a suburb of Dallas. It is a very urban area and have about an acre yard in a subdivison where most yards are less than a quarter of an acre. I have 3 dogs and 2 cats and an assortment of fish. I am a single mom with a 7 year old son. Since I have 3 dogs and 2 cats and have to work outside the home to support said animals and son and myself, I have a doggie door installed in my back door. It leads to the backyard that is enclosed with an 8 ft wooden fence. I also have a diving pool that is enclosed with a what I call a 6 ft cyclone fence. That is to keep out kids and dogs and leaves to some extent. I have 2 sheds in the back yard. One is made of tin/aluminum and the other is home built out of plywood and was erected by a previous owner of the home. That one is in bad shape but I haven't had the time (or energy to go out and tear it down.)

The Beginning
One night in June, I went to lock the back door before going to bed and found my largest dog, Merlin (Golden Retriever Mix), acting guilty and trying to cover something he was chewing on with his body. I made him move so I could see what it was and I jumped back about 4 feet when I saw it was a dead animal with very large teeth. It's fur was gone and it's teeth were exposed and they were HUGE. At first, I thought it was a rat because it had a long hairless rat like tail but on closer inspection I determined it was in fact an adolescent possum. I was trying to figure out how to get the damn thing out of the house and dispose of it so the dog wouldn't just bring it back in while I wasn't looking. I finally settled on getting the large long handled dustpan that I use as a pooper scooper and a rake and scooped it up and dumped it into a Walmart bag and tied it up good and put it in my trash can that was dog proof. I yelled at the dog but he was still looking pretty pleased with himself. I made him go into the bedroom with me and didn't think much about it beyond having a good story to tell at work the next day.

About a week later, I am coming home around 9PM from having spent the evening with the neighbors and their kids at Chuck E Cheese (so you know what kind of evening I was having) We pulled up out front only to see an animal eating the catfood I had out. I have a cat that I have that refuses to come in the house because he doesn't like the dogs. The cat was just sitting there watching the animal and my son and I managed to get with in about 10 feet before it scurried off into my Azaleas. We peeked in and could see a possum about the size of a small adult cat. It was kinda cute and looked pretty harmless. UGLY teeth though.

So that night, I wake up about 2AM to go to the bathroom. I go without turning on a light and on the way back to bed, I step on something cold and wet. I am groggily thinking great, one of the dogs has barfed and now I get to clean it up in the middle of the night. I reach over and flip on the light and what do I see??? Another dead possum!! I stepped on a dead possum barefoot!! For the first time in my life I wished the dogs had just barfed on the carpet. This one was also furless and pretty much a bloody mess and really ugly. The golden retriever was hiding in the closet at this point because he heard me yell when I flipped on the light. I am pretty sure I was cussing him pretty good too at that point. So, first I thoroughly scrubbed the offended foot and then I went thru the pooper scooper Walmart bag routine again. As an added precaution, I closed off the doggie door.

I pretty much kept the doggie door closed at night for the next 2 weeks. No sign of any critters so after 2 weeks I got lax about closing it off at night. So, I am leaving it open again and I get up in the middle of the night to take the puppy out (she won't go out at night by herself.). I flip on the light in the family room (where the backdoor with the doggie door is) and DAMN IF THERE ISN'T ANOTHER DEAD POSSUM. Again, I go thru the pooper scooper Walmart bag routine and again say a few choice words to Merlin. I again started shutting the doggie door but figured that I couldn't have anymore in the area because I had ALREADY HAD 3.

So, life goes on as normal. I get up one morning and am running late for work. I had borrowed a computer monitor from a lady from work and needed to return it. So, I rushed into the family room to get it and put it in the car and I am sure you can guess what I found. Yes another possum! At this point, I was more pissed off at the dog than anything. I really needed to get to work. But, I couldn't leave a possum in the house. I was trying to keep my 7 year old from seeing it. So of course, he dashed into the family room once he found out there was a possum in there. "I just want to see it" he said. Well, I am thoroughly pissed off and am trying to get the kid and the dogs out of the way and get the stupid thing cleaned up. I go outside and the the rake and scooper and my son is kinda hovering over it and saying look Mom isn't it cute. See this one still had it's fur and except for a little blood looked pretty much uninjured. I reach down with the rake and the scooper and begin to scoop it when IT MOVES!!! I think it is safe to say I jumped about 10 feet this time. Now, my son is saying things like "Mom we have to help it" and "Mom, can I keep it as a pet." I am thinking I am really going to be late to work and I may kill the dog before I go. The possum stays rolled up in a ball. I go back and scoop it into the scooper. It is now playing dead. I am trying to figure out what to do with it because if I just put it in the yard like it is, it will get killed by the dog and probably end up back in the house. There is no way I am going to try to put a live possum in a Walmart bag. I ended up putting it on the other side of the fence (still in the yard, but over by the old shed) and leaving it in the scooper. I was figuring that if I came home and it was still in the scooper, it would be easier to dispose of already scooped. If I came home and it was gone, then it was not severely injured and would hopefully have learned it's lesson about venturing into a yard with dogs.

I am a little leary on the way home, I really don't want to deal with it anymore and to my luck, it is gone from the scooper. I suspect it crawled under the old shed and made a getaway at some point. I don't really know. It was however the last possum in the house (Thank God!)

Honnnneeeeyyy, I'm Hooommmme

Well that wasn't too painful but isn't what I call fun either.

Women should not send husband's shopping to buy shoes for them or for bedding and linens.

What was his wife thinking? Did she really think he would be able to figure out what he wanted by telling him a light yellow bedcovering? I mean that could be a quilt or a comforter or just a bedspread or a duvet. He was a very nice guy though and bought us lunch at August Moon.

I am glad to be done though. There is only so much conversation I can carry on with a married Indian guy that is about 15 years older than me. We did manage to get him 3 business suits that I will go pick up on Tuesday for him when they finish the alterations. K&G Men's Warehouse is the place to go for Suits, Tux's and Ties.

A parting word

Y'all be good while I am gone.

(And clean your room!)

The Agenda for today

My company has locations all over the world, but our headquarters is in Canada. We have outsourced our IT and AP departments to India. As a result, we have quite a number of Indians working in Toronto to kind of liase with the offices in India. We have had some AP problems since we changed over to a new financial system so some of the guys from the Toronto office have come down to help. Of course, anyone that is traveling at all MUST go shopping. I think it is a law. At any rate, I volunteered to take this Indian guy from Canada shopping today. It promises to be a fun day. We are looking for bedding. My ADD 7 year old should have a barrel of fun doing that. WHAT WAS I THINKING???? I hope this doesn't take hours.